Lately I've been looking back a lot (no, not at my ass) and now I'm doing it in a whole new way. Sometimes you just have to completely remove yourself from something to really see how bad it really was. I'm finally starting to get Jen back and after 2 years of trying so hard to recapture what I had lost I feel like I'm making a new path for myself. I can't remember the last time I was comfortable in my own skin and I can't even explain how much it means to me. Over the course of a year I let two people completely crush my spirit and make me feel useless and unwanted. I had just one person left to lean on and when he pulled out I fell on my face. He will never know how much that helped me though, because I needed to hit bottom to realize how much I had let them change me. I no longer feel out of place and I feel like I actually have my brain, my disorder and everything inside in order. My life is a total mess, but at least my head is in the right spot; what more could I ask for? Life is good… and its about to get a whole lot better!
